Well the key to attractwho arent abusive or overly jealous) is to absolutly love yourself and be confident and know what you want and deserve. Abusive men tend to be attracted to women with a certain state of mind. Like a woman with a personality that is easily dominated. As long as a woman is strong and respects herrself, it seems she will get great men. Losers and abusers are attracted to low self confidence...the thrive in it.
And hey, a little jealousy is not that bad. Its not always a sign of being possesive. Sometimes its just a sign that they like you a lot and are insecure and dont think they're good enough. But too much jealousy is bad. And theres nothign wrong with not dating. I decided to wait until I was older and several months later, my beautiful mate came along.
His jealousy was definately aggressive and dangerous, it can be flattering as you say, but for some reason, I prefer people not to love me too much. Love can be dangerous. I guess that's until I fall in love, then I won't be saying that!
Unfortunately for most guys, I can't be dominated. I can be a little submissive, to keep the peace, as we all do from time to time, and sometimes that can really get me down, I wish I was more assertive. But when it comes to men, there is no way they can change my individuality or stop me pursuing whatever career I want to pursue, or stop me hanging with a guy friend. But, I do know that I'd be quite weird if my boyfriend had a girl friend he hang with, unless I knew her quite well, then that'd be alright. It's a matter of trusting each other I suppose?
I'm not asking you to move a mountain. Simple complements would suffice, I'm not saying help him get out on top of the male hierarchy, but boost his confidence.
If you say some encouraging things to him about his masculinity, you'll see an improvement in his demeanor and he might be a little more comfortable about you talking to other guys.
men are just as self conscious as women but with different things.

Trust me, I know how self concious men are. I'm not particularly self concious about my looks, not as much as a few guys I know, who preen themselves are more than me! I like to look nice, but I dress in a way that isn't common around here. That's what I take pride in. Oh, and smelling nice too
I know what you mean though. If I ever loved a guy, I'd love complimenting him. But only if I meant it, so he doesn't think I'm doing it just to be nice (He won't believe me). I don't take compliments well myself, I generally think people are lying. But I'm slowly getting over that, because I get compliments for playing gigs and other guitar things, and while I don't like being crowded over by 'fans' (yes, I've had fans, my bands have had followers, weird!), I am learning to accept that I have a talent. I just lack an ego. I wouldn't want the guy to think I was a great fib!
I was, though, capable of hurting a woman in other ways, mentally. Purely through me being unable to control my emotions. I detest what I was. I also feel I paid the price for my sins.
I think, as humans, we all have the capability to seriously hurt people mentally. I've hurt people mentally too, in fact, everybody I know has done it, whether in the school yard, work, or family. Luckily, the things I did were forgiven fairly quick. I've also been hurt badly, as we all will or have been at some stage.
needed to feel needed. I didn't feel that the relationship was even. If your that way inclined and you feel that things are a bit one sided (I'm talking emotionally, and affection, that kind of stuff) then yeah, the green eyes start glowing and the smallest things start snowballing.
I agree with that, also. You have to need each other. Independence and strong will and stubborness in males and females can be extremely aggrivating. I'm not very independent, I hate being out in public alone, yet I like being alone (stupid). I'm stubborn, but I don't tend to show it and agree with people just to avoid a fight (Though in my head I'm saying what idiots they are). But, some guys like to try and tame that. Some tried to tame my individuality, that eccentric bit, but they failed. Not because I was aggressively stubborn about my ideals, but simply because I refused silently.
I must go, off to the music store to look at guitars, god knows I have 5 already, but oh well! Again, your help is wonderful, thankyou!