Jamie wrote:Set wrote:Oh feh. The difference between therian and furry has been argued about and run into the ground so many times I stopped counting.
I personally don't see that much of a difference in the two. I've been in both therian and furry communities for years and the only real difference I've run across is that those therians who would bite someone's head off for calling them furry are horrible snobs. It's like rich people looking down on anyone with less money than them. They take offence at the stupidest things and are not at all helpful in most instances. That "I-am-holier-than-thou and my-way-is-the-only-way-cuz-I-said-so" attitude got on my nerves. Otherkin tend to be the same way. Hence why I've abandoned the therian and 'kin boards altogether.
Furries are a more accepting bunch, nothing like the therians I've run across. (Not counting anyone here, you all seem nice to me.) They don't take things quite so seriosly and actually know how to have fun.
My impression of the therian community is that it tends to get
snobbish and weird from time to time
because it focuses more on beliefs, and when you deal with beliefs, there are always going to be disagreements that cause tension. The various message boards and communities recognize this, which is one of the reasons why they have such elaborate rules and are so good (lots of practice) at nipping flame wars in the bud, but the tension about differing beliefs between different people is still there below the surface.
Furries, meanwhile, focus mainly on activities (art appreciation, costuming, etc.) instead of beliefs. So
they tend to be more laid-back and accepting, or at least it feels that way, because it ends up being more about participating in things with people who share your interests, which is pretty much always fun stuff, regardless of whether those interests are furry stuff or snowboarding.
You might compare it to a political party vs. a theater club. The theater people are there to indulge in a passion, but, for the political party, it is more about struggling to shape the views of the whole group, which is a more stressful process.
It's responses like these that set back furry/therian relations.
And that's coming from someone who's dialogued with both communities
about the other one, in a harmonious fashion, and interact freely with both.
For the record, some furry communities are quite accepting, UNTIL THEY KNOW YOU'RE A THERIAN.
One rather famous saying has been illustrated here. That is, "the main difference between furries and therians is that therians think there is a difference, and furries don't."
Therians and furries are two completely different things, and someone can be both, or one but not the other.
Therianthropy is about something you ARE: you are left-handed, you are a redhead, you are tall, you can wiggle your ears, you can roll your tongue, you are Italian, you are therian. NONE of those things are anything you can control.
Furry is about what you do for fun: you like Star Trek, you are a Yankees fan, you trainspot, you play football. ALL of those things are things you can decide.
Generally speaking, most therians don't have a problem with furries existing.
HOWEVER, there are some perfectly good reasons why some DO.
Here are the reasons.
A) The MAIN REASON is that some furries keep deciding that therians are the same thing as furries. It either reflects a lack of education on what therians and furries are, or a willful ignorance determined to cause friction.
It is difficult enough to come to the concept that you're therian, and then to get past the "no I'm not pretending or delusional" stages, which people will dog you with THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.
Then you come along a community where people have fursonas that ARE pretend (to a degree) who decide that your therianthropy IS pretending or delusional. THAT is bound to set you off. This is a failure of the furry community, NOT the fault of the therians.
B) The next reason is that other people confuse one for the other, AND that
furries are often unable to counteract their OWN bad press. If the average
person thinks they know ANYTHING about furry, they usually think it means the person is a gay fursuiter that wears the fursuit when having sex, or does "things" with stuffed toys. That's a gross misimpression of the vast majority of furries, but it IS what many people have been led to think by the media. (Some furries have ENCOURAGED this.)
So, it's difficult enough to finally try to explain to a loved one about the unusual connections you have inside yourself, and try to overcome their misunderstandings, but to have to overcome TWO different sets of misconceptions makes things much more difficult. Therians can't help about this one-this is a failure of the furry community.
C) Some therians actually encounter the furries about whom the above are actually true. Usually, this leads to friction, and can give the impression that MOST furries really ARE like that. This is not as common, but DOES happen. This one isn't much the problem of therians, but they can affect generalizing like that.
D) Sometimes, people show up in the therian community that are not therians of any kind. Some have decided to pretend they are, and some are bored and WISH they were, thinking it is cool somehow. These people are either delusional, trolling, lying or pretending. These people are not welcome in the therian community, as you might imagine. Some people may confuse them with furries, which is the fault of the people confusing them.
=============
So,
take therians who are minding their own business,
then find some furries who decide that therians are all mistaken, delusional, or furries despite saying they are not.
What do you expect would be the obvious response?
It would resemble "snobbery."
Consider someone who has accepted an inner wolf. This has taken years of self-doubt, examination, acceptance, and ridicule.
Then introduce someone else with a wolf fursuiit who RPs online.
Then have the second guy decide that the first guy is JUST LIKE HIM.
Any correction is BOUND to sound like "snobbery."
One person IS the wolf, the other PRETENDS to be the wolf.
Sounds like snobbery to even mention the difference.
And if the second guy is determined to maintain his ignorance,
he will come away thinking he and the first guy ARE the same thing,
except the first guy is a snob.
===========
Again,
some therians ARE furries, and some therians and furries get along JUST FINE. However, it seems to me that there's a minority determined to derail the friendly dialogues whenever possible by severing understanding.