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Bastet, preserve me

Posted: Fri Nov 18, 2005 8:00 pm
by Cicatriz Astral
My daughter, when watching a stray cat go upstairs, happened to see...well, for the first time, she realized he was a boy, and then loudly proclaimed this fact. :?

I shushed her and ushered her inside. She's only five, and I wasn't aware that anyone had informed her how to spot the difference between male and female cats. I myself had to inform her that humans have different genetalia (and that's as far as that one went, she's only five) a few months ago, but I had no indication from her before tonight that she was aware that this applied to other species as well. Any other moms or dads out there have youngin's who know more than they let on, and how do you get the jump on this sort of thing before they become teenagers? -shudders- :cry:

Posted: Fri Nov 18, 2005 8:22 pm
by Terastas
No cubs of my own, but I keep telling people that their kids are much smarter than they give them credit for. :P

Honestly, if you want to avoid the whole sex-fad thing, your best bet would be to skip all of this cabbage patch crap and tell her the facts of life straight up. The longer you put it off, the greater a shock it will be when she finally finds out. . .

And the sooner you tell her, the less curious she'll be about it, and the less curious she is, the more likely it is that she'll roll her eyes at the kids in school that found out at age ten and are now bragging about how often they beat off, be turned off by the concept and skip the whole "hormone-angsty teen" phase entirely.
Don't laugh, it really works. I'm living proof. :D

Posted: Sat Nov 19, 2005 12:00 am
by white
We have the internet. I can't speak for how good a way it is, but I think working things out for myself worked well enough for me.

Posted: Sat Nov 19, 2005 12:46 am
by Merrypaws
I actually don't remember when I first had the question "Where do babies come from?" answered truthfully, but I take that to mean it was pretty early on.

But honestly, I dare say it made my teen years easier. When some people were squirming about the idea in their early puberty, I was totally cool about it. To me it had been a fact of life for goodness knows how long.

Try hitting the library, I'm sure that the children's section has some books along the vein of "How was baby brother made?" Those things usually lay down the facts without making it sound dirty.

Happy parenting!

Posted: Sat Nov 19, 2005 9:52 pm
by Set
Eh...most kids learn at an early age, and not from their parents either.

Terastas is right. Kids are smarter than people give them credit for. If you just tell her the truth she'll be much better off. All the bull parents tell their kids just messes them up when they finally learn the truth anyway.

Posted: Sat Nov 19, 2005 10:00 pm
by Anubis
i figured it out my self when i was ten how mommy and daddy make babby sister. but i don't sudgest to let having your kid do that

Posted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 1:19 am
by Silverclaw
Just turn on some porn and set em down :wink: :P

I forget how/when I found out. Most likely those stupid sex-ed classes. I think they started showing them in school around late elementry school :|

Posted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 6:23 pm
by Kamara
I grew up on a ranch (still here LOL) so I learned early on the differences between male and female animals.

Nowdays kids seem to be having sex at a much earlier age so I would highly recommend at least exploring the subject now and each year reinforcing it with more information.

If you start early, she will hopefully be comfortable talking to you about how she is feeling and not be nervous to ask you any questions and perhaps avoid some of the pitfalls of teenage life, teenage pregnancy and diseases.

I have a four and seven year old - the oldest has gotten information from us and we've explained early on to both of them about not letting strangers or anyone else touch them anywhere and to tell us etc. Next year I will tell my four year old a little more.

My oldest daughter got an education a little earlier than planned when we went to Sea World (I was pregnant with my other daughter at the time) she was about 3 yrs old and we were watching the orcas in the big outer tank.
Well they will rub on each other and masturbate against males or females (its normal behavior) and a frisky male was doing just that - he rolls his belly towards us and his penis comes out and my daughter stands there with her mouth open and yells "oh my God, Oh my God"
There was about forty or fifty people standing around and they all heard her - a moment of silence ensued and the whole crowd started laughing.
Us included. I mean it was just too funny not to laugh.

Kamara

Posted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 6:25 pm
by Black Shuck
I found out from a book I checked out from the school library in 3rd grade :lol: My mom started working as an x-ray tech and I was excited about all the health stuff, like the names of bones.

I knew that males and females had different parts when I was little though. I think I knew it applied to even cats because when we got my cat neutered, my mom explained it to me as "cutting off his bump".

It's best they find out sooner rather than later though, otherwise it comes as a big shock. From what I've heard, kids learn where babies come from and that's that. They go "Ok" and play dolls or trucks or something. Then if someone else says something about it, they're like "yeah, whatever". After they know, they're good. It's like how "Because I said so" works really well with young kids a lot :lol: All in all, I guess it's best that they know than grow up "sheltered", not knowing about a lot of things in the world. One of my friends went to Germany on a school trip a few years ago and saw a guy selling bongs on a street corner. She thought they were vases ?? This was 9th grade too. So, if they ask, answer. Try not to sugar coat it too much and just give the best explanation you can. And everyone's right: Kids know a lot more than you think :wink:

Posted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 9:24 pm
by Marcwolf
Hmm..

From my own experiences I was very sexually aware from when I was about 8 years old.

However - this did help me at school later. When all of my friend were squirming and shuddering re the fact that their parents had 'SEX' - I just took it as a natural part of showing affection between adults.

Although it did not stop me of being frisky either <Laughs>


Thou on a serious note. I think the concept of trying to shelter children nowadays in a form of 'perpetual childhood' is wrong. We are blasted each day with sexual orientated advertising so it stupid to think that children are not aware of 'sex'

But giving the them best information so they can make an informed choice when faced with a situation (Do I or Don't I get laid.. consequences. protection etc) is vital. It cuts through the old wives tales (Virgins cannot get pregnant. Oral is safe etc) and may saves lives


Maybe it just that some parents are horrified that their child will suddenly realises that the parents 'did it'..

Take Care

Marc

Posted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 9:33 pm
by Black Shuck
Definately want your kids to make the right choices! As far as orals go, one of the nastiest things I've heard of was someone getting a STD in their throat! Children may loose "innocence" when they learn about these things, but there's a fine line between innocence and ignorance (and ignorance isn't always bliss). Good point Marc! :howl:  :oo

Posted: Mon Nov 21, 2005 12:22 am
by Renorei
Definitely give her lots of information, particularly about STDs.

Some quick facts:
-condoms don't work against all STDs
-in particular, they don't protect against the most dangerous one of late, HPV (kills 5,000 women per year, because it causes cervical cancer. Also, it's incurable....you get it for life).
-they aren't foolproof for preventing pregnancy either

Of course, you probably already knew most of that, but I wanted to let you know in case you didn't.

Encourage her, when the time is right, to choose abstinence. Of course, it's her choice if she chooses not to, but definitely let her know this is the best choice.

Plenty of abstinent people go on to have fabolous sex as married couples. :wink:

Area 51 as an erogenous zone

Posted: Tue Nov 22, 2005 10:36 pm
by Scott Gardener
Teach them something, because it's better coming from you than the kid next to them on the school bus. Suppressing knowledge of sexuality like it's between Moulder and Scully simply makes one ignorant and therefore vulnerable. You can teach them that the details should only be known at a certain age, but at least the basics, that there are two different genders with different aspects, and that reproduction involves gametes and pregnancy rather than storks, should help keep them from having a neurotic childhood, followed by a confusing adulescence, where the temptation to react against parential coverups and conspiracies to hide knowledge leads one into STDs and teenage pregnancies, etc.