Venting

[Terastas]

Lycanthropeful: That's completely normal. I'm in the same boat too; there are two large family gatherings on two sides of my family and I can't stand either one of them.

Every year before the gathering, I started off thinking: "Gee, it'll be nice to finally see Aunt [name], Uncle [name] and Aunt [name] again."

Then once at the gathering, I was promptly reminded why I haven't spoken to any of them since the last Christmas gathering.

I used to try and ration that there were only two or three that grated on my nerves and tough it out on the behalf of the others. I later realized it was only two or three that I had a murderous hatred for, and the majority of them either grated on my nerves to a lesser degree or were completely "la-de-dah" and oblivious to the fact that some people in the room can't stand each other.

The relatives of mine that I actually do enjoy the company of are also the ones that usually don't show up either.

It's okay if you can't stand your relatives. Don't forget, you didn't pick any of them.

[lycanthropeful]

It's okay if you can't stand your relatives. Don't forget, you didn't pick any of them.

That certainly makes me feel better. ;)

[Baphnedia]

Hehe. I have quite the opposite problem.

I'm (bleep)ing alone again. Another one goes by and I'm in solitude. Or solitary. Right now, I'm leaning more towards the latter. Feh.

[RedEye]

Lycanthropeful: Tinnitus is the result of damage to the cochlea, the part of the ear that actually hears. What happens is that some of the nerves that send sound information to the brain are "short circuited" and fire off constantly.
There is no cure. Some substances can cause "a tinnitis" as a result of their action in the body, but that's a side effect of something else.
Actual tinnitis can sometimes be moderated with medications, but if there is hearing loss, not much can be done.
Oddly, one "treatment" that seems to work to help with the problem is the use of earplugs to reduce background noise. Since I have tinnitus, I can testify that this odd treatment does work to a degree. Try earplugs with a 20-22 dba reduction capability. They don't stop the tinnitis, but they do block confusing background noise and make it a bit easier to hear clearly.

[Baphnedia]

Why do I get the filling that you and I have tinnitis for the same (general) thing? For me (and probably for you) it's 10% disability. Yay. Sadly, my extraordinary hearing has become 'good' hearing (it used to be my best sense), because I'm blinds as a bat.

[Vagrant]

The strangest thing about it is that my hearing hasn't suffered, it's still surprisingly good. And I can frequently hear things casually that others would have to stop and listen for, I'm often the one who brings strange sounds to the attention of others.

That's a curse more than a blessing sometimes though because it leads me to go off on these mad quixotic quests to track down and identify the strange sounds that sometimes only I can hear. Anyone who hasn't been around me much tends to doubt my sanity when I do that, but those I'm acquainted with know better. I've tracked down all sorts of things by hearing alone, even a defective plug.

But one loud sound ... bam, bye goes my hearing, hello nausea and ringing. It's usually not very bad at all, the extent of the noise has an effect but the elongation of it makes it far worse. If there are people shouting then I can end up next to deaf, and that's really not very fun at all as I tend to rely on my hearing quite a bit.

I might have to try earplugs though, I've never heard that one before but I can see how it makes sense, and I'm willing to give almost anything a shot ... because it really can be an impairing disability. It means I tend to have to keep myself to quiet environments because I don't really have any other choice, unless I actually want to suffer. Which I don't.

[Wingman]

I'm...irritated I guess, I forgot entirely about Christmas up until yesterday, which annoyed me since I realized I'd have to run out if I wanted to have any cereal for the next couple days. On top of that, and for some reason since I started playing Left 4 Dead last week, my mojo is gone. I was brimming with ideas and inspirations, and now...nothing. I'm a void, I need something, something new.
I'm sure someone expected me to buy presents for them, but I just don't feel it. I mean, I don't want presents, so doesn't that balance the fact that I don't want to give presents? Shouldn't it be a mutual thing? I've asked for four things in the last decade, and that was just because they weren't for sale where I live. Buying things that people don't actually want, which is everything my sisters have been been bothering me to get, just doesn't seem like a good idea for me. I've only bought a handful of presents ever, all of which have lost their appeal within weeks or days of the recipient getting them. And then immediately afterward they come back to me whining that they want something new without considering that I just spent my available money on the first present.

I want to be outside, but it's freezing out there which robs all the pleasure from the experience. This vague need to do something, anything, is tearing me apart.

[Kami]

@Vagrant

Yeah, I know what you mean. I'll be out in the middle of nowhere, talking to someone, and then I'll suddenly hear something and just stop. I look around, and the other person obviously didn't hear anything, so I look like a complete idiot. Typically, the sound will be a rustling in the brush, though I once heard thunder and didn't recognize it at first. Luckily, I managed to figure it out quickly, and got out of there before the surprise storm hit.

I also suffer from tinnitus, and it has caused me to despise the 4th of July. Next to Valentine's Day, it's my least favorite holiday, despite the fact that it marks our independence.

[Vagrant]

Okay, new venty-vent time for me. I usually dislike this because it makes me feel like a bit of a pretentious goit, but oh well...

I really dislike the way that CSS standards are handled, officially. And because of this, I almost forced my opinions on spongypants, and I feel really bad about that. But it's not about design, it's about how the standards can make designs and designers look bad, that bothers me, and sometimes my feelings regarding that come out a bit wrong.

Most standards expect an ideal situation, a perfect connection and a server that will never hiccup, but while this is becoming more and more the case, it's not unfathomable that these things can occur. Having to connect to servers over the pond, and having been on dial-up in the past, I've seen sites that have totally crapped out thanks to CSS, and they've looked bad because of it, but it's not the designer's fault. They're operating within the standards after all, some do so with meticulous perfection that I admire.

But when CSS does fail, because either the server hiccuped and failed to send the CSS sheet, or because it got lost somewhere thanks to a bad connection, the site ends up looking awful because of it, as if one were browsing the Internet via an application that can only handle text an images, like WAP, for instance. All the beautiful design of the page is gone.

This is why I went on about my preferences of embedding CSS rather than actually having it in a separate file, because it means that as long as the file containing that embedded CSS comes through alright, then usually the CSS will too. In my opinion this is simply making the best out of a bad situation.

What I'd prefer to see is for CSS to have fail-safes, for it to actually have errors that browsers could support. So if a CSS file was lost due to the server or due to a hiccup, a tidy error could be presented instead of a messy page, and then people would know that the error lies with the server, the server's connection, or their own connection rather than with the site's designer.

I love CSS, and I think good CSS design is beautiful. The CSS zen garden is evidence of this, and that's why it's all the more a shame that the system is so rickety that that beauty can be randomly replaced by the mess I described above. It's not the fault of the designers, as I said--they're just following the official documentation and that's something they should do, it's just an inherent problem with how CSS is handled on the client-side itself.

After all, there are no errors on the client-side, and most web browsers don't even make extra attempts at retrieving the CSS sheet before just going on ahead and rendering the page without that layout information.

If that was cleared up, then CSS would be flawless for me.

[Terastas]

Check it out Lycanthropeful. Everyone can relate to that:
http://www.homestarrunner.com/xmas08.html

[Howlitzer]

Yeah the tinnitus thing is something I'm all-too familiar with as well...though I still have very good hearing. The ringing is in the very, VERY high pitched range, and I can actually hear a bit above the normal range. i.e... I have hearing damage, but the damage is above the range that most people would ever even notice.

Though I can say from experience that RedEye's approach works. In fact....I wore some 30dB earplugs for 2 full days once over the summer just for the hell of it. I think this let me better filter out the ringing, because when I took them out the ringing STAYED at a much lower, less noticeable volume for several days.




As for my reason for posting in the venting thread....

I seem to be a magnet for filing errors. Seriously.

I've now had who knows HOW many drawn-out, inconvenient mixups due to somebody, somewhere, messing up the spelling of my name or other important identification numbers associated with me...

here's how it usually goes:
-I fill out forms...CORRECTLY.
-I hand in forms...CORRECTLY.
- Someone, somewhere, spells my name incorrectly, decides that my SSN or other identification number is different than it is clearly printed on the form, and enters it in wrong.
- Nothing happens. I wonder why.
- I get bounced around customer service or various associated offices for multiple hours....and discover the problem.
- I fax over the correct information.
- They say the fax goes through, everything should be set by the next business day.
- 4 business days later.....I notice things still aren't working.
- Their response "I'm sorry, we didn't receive a fax".
- Lather, rinse, repeat.

Some of my favorite previous results of this:
- most of my life savings vanishes in the woodwork.
- I wind up on a federal watchlist (or something to that effect) because it appears that I am falsifying my identity.

The latest result: my last paycheck, which would have provided spending money since my bank account is now depleted from Christmas....is nowhere to be seen. The records show it as being payed....the deposit shows up as $0. Which means I now have virtually no money. Oh joy.

Time to shovel snow (of course it all melted today). Or setup a paypal account and start taking some small commissions. Either way...grr.

At least I'm at home with my parents over break. :/

[lycanthropeful]

Check it out Lycanthropeful. Everyone can relate to that:
http://www.homestarrunner.com/xmas08.html

Hahaha... "He's having some of his Philosophy department colleagues over this year!" Oh dear, how I can relate. Thanks for the link, Terastas!

[Gevaudan]

Proof that visiting relatives over the holidays can warp your brain.

[Set]

This is the perfect example of my luck, right here.

I'm being kicked out of the house. Over something stupid, no less. I have until the end of February to find another place to live. On top of that, my college classes start tomorrow.

Bloody lovely.

[Kaebora]

I'm being kicked out of the house. Over something stupid, no less.

In first person perspective to yourself, it may look like a stupid reason. More often than not, parents have a good reason. (Unless they are dysfunctional.) Being too old indeed is always a good reason. I'd say anyone older than 22 is too old and prone to prompt kick-out at any time.

Therefore, they could be using the stupid reason to cover up the real reason. They don't want their kids lingering in their home past the age of 20. It sucks, I know. This happens to everyone eventually.

My parents don't want me to move out until I pay them back money I owe them, but I am moving anyways because I'm 23 and need my personal space already. At least my mother is mad about it. Kinda backwards right?

[Set]

[...(Unless they are dysfunctional.)]

Meet my mother, the abusive psycho. Only reason I'm staying with her is because I don't have anywhere else to go.

Hand me a plane ticket and money for cab fare, however, and I'd be out of here in a heartbeat.

[vrikasatma]

The employment situation is getting BAD here.

Eugene continues to hemorrhage jobs, and now I understand that employers are checking job applicants' credit scores as a hiring criterium. I got a lousy credit score because I let some medical bills float. What choice did I have? My insurance didn't cover lab expenses and it's not like I can pull $900 out of a drawer or off a bush at the drop of a hat.

I have some art and things I can sell, but everyone around here is in the same boat; you can't sell if no-one's buying. This is another reason businesses are shuttering left, right and centre: people have gone into lockdown mode and aren't spending anything if there isn't a pressing need for it. Read: rent/mortgage, food/fuel, utilities bills, insurance if applicable, taxes.

My family isn't helping, either. Mom has dementia and she keeps saying over and over again, "Get a job, honey." I tell her, "I can't, there are no jobs." I added the thing about employers running credit checks now last night; she said "What does that mean?" and I had to spell it out for her: two applicants, one has a 635 credit score, one has 900, the latter gets the job and the former gets a "Sorrygoodluck." Mom said, "Oh," and exactly — EXACTLY!! — thirty seconds later said, "Get a job, honey." Lather, rinse, repeat. She'd totally forgotten what I'd just told her.

I've taken her number off my phone. I won't be calling her anymore, and probably won't answer if she calls. I'm in enough trouble without dealing with a brain-damaged mother squawking at me about getting a job, and me getting stressed out banging my head against TWO brick walls. It's like when I was in culinary academy, with an abusive chef instructor cracking the whip over me and telling me not to stress out.

I keep wondering what I'm going to do when the bottom drops out and the well runs dry. All I have to say is, when that happens...heaven help the next person that denies me a job and says "Sorrygoodluck."

[Terastas]

My family isn't helping, either. Mom has dementia and she keeps saying over and over again, "Get a job, honey." I tell her, "I can't, there are no jobs." I added the thing about employers running credit checks now last night; she said "What does that mean?" and I had to spell it out for her: two applicants, one has a 635 credit score, one has 900, the latter gets the job and the former gets a "Sorrygoodluck." Mom said, "Oh," and exactly — EXACTLY!! — thirty seconds later said, "Get a job, honey." Lather, rinse, repeat. She'd totally forgotten what I'd just told her.

I have the same problem with my mother. I've currently run into the Catch 22 of job markets; the few people offering employment at the moment all want someone with a crapload of job experience, and since nobody has hired me, I don't have any. What's worse: some of them have even expressed doubt/concern over me for currently being unemployed. . . Which is, of course, what I've been trying to fix for the past year.

The fact that I didn't complete college due to mishandled finances doesn't really help my case either. I don't think too many people believe me when I tell them my brother screwed me royally just because he could.

My mother meanwhile seems to think all the jobs in Massachusetts are all sitting in the bargain bin at Walmart just waiting for me to pick one out. She also seems to think I alone make up the country's 7% unemployment rating and that absolutely no one else but me is applying for any of these jobs. She says "get a job" the same way she says "get my coffee" when I'm going to the supermarket. I don't know if she really is genuinely clueless or is fully aware how bad the situation is but doesn't want to admit it (because conceding to the fact that I won't be getting employed any time soon might mean she'll have to cut back on some of her spending, which I know she doesn't want to do), but either way, she's got me pretty pissed because of it.

What's worse, she's still incredibly picky about what jobs she wants me to apply for. I don't even know what her criteria is -- she'll tell me she doesn't want me doing something hard, depressing or degrading, then she'll come running into the room with a want ad to show me a job that's equally as hard, depressing or degrading, if not more so. Other job prospects she's quickly disregarded as pipe dreams, then less than an hour later will start nagging me to write jokes to Leno or some other hair-brained one-in-a-million odds chance. The last prospect I had required me buying a train ticket into Boston, and after crying to me for a few hours about how I could only have been interested in this to try and make her worry, feel bad or whatever, she finally conceited, but by then the $20 I'd put away to get the ticket had "mysteriously" disappeared.

The only pattern I'm noticing in what she likes and dislikes is that my ideas are always crap and her ideas she nags me to pursue relentlessly no matter how retarded they are, so apparently she's one of those women that thinks her vagina is an all-seeing third eye and that the penis knows only lies.

It's only by the grace of God that I wound up stuck living in a "la-de-dah" community full of trust fund babies and well-to-do dullards that can afford to spend money on crap they don't need, so I might be able to get a little bit of money coming in as a photographer. I've got over a hundred bucks saved away from Christmas and am applying to a gallery under new ownership, but whether or not I'll even have a shot at making money as a photographer depends on two things: 1) Whether the new gallery owner likes my work, and 2) How well hidden that hundred dollars I stashed away is. My mother didn't even make it until New Years' Day before she started hitting me up for money to play the lottery with (which is another one of her brilliant job solutions). This happened last year; I put money aside but made the mistake of telling her exactly how much I had and she blew it all on herself. She is completely numb to even so much as the concept of saving up for a rainy day, never mind investing.

The employment situation is bad everywhere; the only people hiring right now are collection firms and unemployment agencies. Way to go Dubya!

Best of luck to you Vrik. And also to anyone else feeling the pain.

[Kaebora]

Hopefully Obama's plan to use public works projects to employ americans will stimulate the economy more than a one-time check from Dubya. (I never qualified for one of those checks anyways.)


I'm in an unsafe position myself. I can't move to Canada for college until the job market stabolizes there as well. I have to keep my job and stay put, sitting on my savings until I can take the risk. So more or less I feel like I'm wasteing years of my life best spent being educated for my career. It could be worse. I just don't like living in Albuquerque.

For now I'm just dabbling in the tutorials and 3D demos I obtained over the years. That, and tinkering with graphics in Second Life, making a little extra coin there.

[vrikasatma]

[Terastas]

Hey, Einstein! If I had a job, I wouldn't be trying to start my own business, would I?!

Sounds like we have a lot in common. One of the last jobs I applied for was to be a cashier in a cupcake store. . . Yes, that's right. Not a bakery, just cupcakes, and when I gave the guy my resume, he told me that he was "concerned" and "had doubts about my level of responsibility" because I was presently unemployed.

It was on the tip of my tongue to say: "Well genius, if I already had a job right now, I wouldn't be looking for work in a freakin' cupcake shop, now would I?!"

That's the Catch 22 I was alluding to earlier. Evidently, with unemployment shooting through the roof, all the employers out there have decided they can be that much more picky about who they hire on for even the most menial and abysmal of job openings.
Today I saw a job offer on Craigslist for doormen: "must have prior experience." Huh!?!

I'd swear they smell the blood in the water. They see the figures, the latest layoffs, and see it as an opportunity to get more out of their employees for less. I didn't graduate from college and I never got my driver's license -- with that in mind, I'm not expecting to get my dream job. . .
But I still think I should have qualified to work the counter in a freakin' cupcake shop!

[Wingman]

"Welcome to Cupcake Sales 101, for the next 16 weeks I will instruct you on the proper way to sell a cupcake."

People are stupid sometimes, and to be perfectly honest the education and employment system is in dire need of overhaul. Like how it's essentially measuring how long you spent drinking beer in college, and not your actual skills and proficiencies.
In a month or two I'll be unemployed (moving down south closer to civilization), so that's going to be fun.

[Terastas]

I can't wait for the Summer.

Not because I dislike the cold though. On the contrary, I actually do much better in the cold than I do in the heat. I just can't wait until it warms up so my mother can't use "I'm trying to warm up" as an excuse not to get up off of her *** and see if the dog is barking at her because her dish is empty.

She swore to me for the second time that she would never get another dog (she'd made that promise before and swiftly broken it), and not only did she break that promise again, she took money out of my freakin' college savings to buy it and now expects me to take care of it. Oh yeah, and she's once again promising "no more dogs after this one" again.

And she wonders why I hate that dog so much. The fact that it's a selfish little brat of a dog is only half the problem.

If anyone asks why I've got such tremendous bags under my eyes, it's from countless nights being left too pissed off to go to sleep. This is one such night.

[outwarddoodles]

dfdfdfsfsafsdasdfsda!

MY XBOX'S DISK TRAY ISN'T RECOGNIZING ANY OF MY GAMES!


I don't want to send it back in, or risk having to buy a new console. What the hell am I supposed to be doing?

[Kaebora]

@ Terastas: Get a bank savings account that only you can access. You can't count on your mother to handle your finances, or to fight the urge to find your stash of cash. Thats why I always have had direct deposit, and a savings account with only my name on it.

@ outwarddoodles: Self repair. There are disk drives that you can purchase that are compatible with Xbox consoles. Google it.